It was the mid 2000's, and I was getting ready to graduate from college.  My mom, my college roommate (and great friend), and I went to Tanzania together over our winter break.
 
We didn't know what we were getting into. It was our first trip to Africa, and my first trip to anywhere except Europe. I remember driving down the road after being picked up at Kilimanjaro airport, in pitch black, with that unique, signature smokey smell drifting through the car. 
 
Going to Tanzania the first time seriously changed my life. Yup, it's that cliche and I'm sheepish to re-read what I just wrote, as I'm not particularly nostalgic or emotional. Still, it's true.  I learned so much on the trip, but perhaps more importantly, it made me want to learn so much more. About other places, other cultures, travel, animals, everything.

Here are seven important (and not so important) things I learned on my first safari, my first trip to a less developed country, and my first trip to Africa.  

When DH and I got engaged in 2012, it wasn't obvious where we were going to have a wedding. In part, this was because I wasn't super keen on a wedding, really. Have I mentioned I'm super introverted? Yup, I am, and spending 6 hours socializing with acquaintances makes me exhausted, not invigorated.  I threw out ideas like eloping in Africa, which--for the record--I still think is a genuinely great idea. But I didn't get very far. 

So where were we going to have a small, intimate wedding? A Washington DC wedding was not in the cards, so we were going to have to travel (keeping this blog-related, see?!)...

Ok...is it weird I'm still embarrassed to sit around a table taking pictures of my food and drink?  My friends don't care, my husband doesn't care, but I just feel so strange doing it.  Total aversion (face in hands).

Anyway, I went to Richmond on Saturday to visit a good friend.  I was really impressed by the food and drink scene--not so much by the impossibly horrible traffic getting down there from DC on a Saturday. I mean, yea I know I live in a major metropolitan area known for terrible-horrible-no-good-very-bad traffic, but I really don't sit in traffic that much. Well, I got my full yearly dose yesterday.  I had no idea that 90 miles could take 4 hours, but guess what, it can!

Sigh.  But I have to say that the company and the beer (and the tacos) really made up for it.  Let's first start with the three breweries.  

We went to Tunisia in 2009, before the Arab Spring and all the things that have happened since. I don't want to dwell on the Arab Spring (there are plenty of sites out there for that), but I think I'd be remiss in talking about Tunisia without saying something. 

As a tourist, I couldn't really "see" or "sense" the bubbles about to explode.  Maybe I was just young and naive, or maybe it wasn't apparent if you didn't spend more time there. I don't know. Yes, there were little things that just seemed off at the time, like how our guide said he had to check in at least 2 times per day with the authorities, since we were all Americans, to tell them our location, destination, and to make sure everything was o.k.  We'll never know if this was really true--or not--or if they were checking to make sure we weren't press or something else.  And of course if you had read just a little deeper, you were well aware of ongoing turmoil, including concern from NGOs on human rights records, news censorship, and the general corruption of the ruling elite.  But the Tunisians also were proud of their successes and pretty moderate society. If you've gone to Tunisia both before and after the revolution as a visitor, please chime in, I'd really be curious to see how your impressions have changed.

 I'm definitely glad we went--it was a fascinating place and the first time I had visited a Muslim country.  Call me strange, but I actually enjoy waking up to the call to prayer most mornings. Much better than beeeep beeeep beeeep. Their archaeological sites are absolutely incredible (Dougga and El Djem are deserving of their own posts), as is the country's long and varied history. That said, we spent two weeks there which I think was a wee bit too long. Particularly because we were on a tour, and couldn't linger where we wanted and move on (city-wise) from what was just meh. For example, I'd have loved to spend more time in Sidi Bou Said, but I was ready to get out of Sousse after a morning walk.

However, Tozeur, Tunisia was one of my favorite places.  When I imagined an "oasis", I imagined a place like Tozeur, where all of a sudden, palm trees and life appear out of nothing.  Bonus, the locals even called me Anna Kournikova, since I was blond. That was enough to seal my affinity for the place.

We asked our tuk-tuk driver to take us to a place where we could see how silk was made...since we had no idea...and he suggested Artisans D'Angkor, a short ride on the outskirts of Siem Reap.

I think we had sort of viewed Artisans D'Angkor in our guide books as an "eh" destination.  As in it might be interesting, but it could feel too touristy or artificial.  I have to say, we had such a wonderful time! They do such a fantastic job showing the process of making silk fabrics.

Artisans D'Angkor is a pretty large organization, but I think they do a legitimate job trying to achieve their mission: to preserve traditional Khmer skills, and to improve the future of the Cambodian people.  Artisans D'Angkor trains young people with limited or no education, as apprentices, to then work in their workshops or find employment elsewhere.  They also offer opportunities to those with disabilities.

Artisans d'Angkor was an off-shoot, from my understanding, of a development program started by the EU to improve job opportunities for the next generation of Khmer in the early 1990's. According to their website, Artisans d'Angkor now provides jobs for 1300 people.  They have 41 workshops doing different types of Khmer crafts.

If you have ever gone on a tour, whether private, small or large, for a few hours or a few days, it's probable you've experienced a "cultural visit". This type of activity seems particularly common in Africa, but I'm sure it exists in other places, too. Sometimes these visits take you to a staged location, for demonstrations of traditional activities. Other times these visits take you to a private home or compound for a visit and a local beverage, where you talk to the owner(s) and family. Or you may just visit a village to look around and interact with the people. These days, you can even pay to take a tour of a slum.

But sometimes reality blurs: the differentiation between "staged" and "authentic" isn't so clear. For example, the people really do live there, but they are demonstrating activities they don't do on a regular basis (either traditional activities, or maybe those they think visitors find most fascinating). Or perhaps the entire hut compound is staged, though the people live nearby with similar accommodations.

While my 20-year old self liked to get a little tan, my soon to be 30-year old self slathers on SPF every morning like a champ.  And while I still love beaches with the best of them, I don't just laze out baking like toast.  Yea, I still have some awful tan lines on my legs from running, but if you can figure out how to keep sunscreen on through 15 miles in Washington DC's humidity in the summer, I suggest you patent that like yesterday.

Over the last few years, in my attempt to protect myself from the sun, I've acquired a few items of clothing I adore.  They keep me shaded without making me uncomfortably hot. They protect me from UV rays. Dare I say it, they are mostly fashionable too.  Win-win-win.

Without further adieu, here are my favorite five pieces of sun-protective clothing, fully tested in wonderfully sunny places and hot climates, where without copious amounts of sunscreen or gear, you'll probably end up looking like a lobster.  

OMGeeezieee...this makes me feel so old!  I went to Chamonix when I was in college, over spring break my freshman year.  Chamonix was my first trip to France, and totally amazing spring skiing. I snowboarded down L'Aiguille du Midi (the Vallee Blanche) which I still think is pretty freaking awesome. It was the only time, in my nearly 2 decades of snowboarding/skiing, that I wondered if I had gotten in over my head. I mean, we passed someone who had fallen into a crevasse, and was at least 20 feet down (it really does happen, they aren't kidding when they warn you to watch where you turn). But I made it down, in one piece, and absolutely thrilled by the experience. As I'm sure you can glean by my excessive use of adjectives.

I've already discussed my frustrations with dealing with people who are just inappropriate/racist about foreign places and people. But what about those who are jealous or envious of your travels and experiences? They can also be incredibly frustrating and patience-testing, whether it is a friend, family member, coworker, acquaintance, or random person you meet on the airplane (for the record, I hate talking to people on the airplane...way to much of an introvert to enjoy that).
 
From personal experience, and stories from others, it seems "trip-envy" (as it will be known) most commonly presents itself in one of these five manifestations:
-my trip was somuchawesomer than yours,
-complete indifference, 
-sh*tting on everything you mention,
-obvious, explicit jealousy, and
-feigned happiness/enthusiasm.
 
While I don't always succeed--probably because I'm not a shrink and I prefer relationships with horses and dogs--I truly try to adhere to the following, generally polite, methods for interactions with individuals who fall into these categorizations.

For U.S. citizens, Bhutan is one of those places where you must travel via a tour operator, which includes having a guide on the ground with you during your entire stay in Bhutan.  It's not optional--you won't get your visa without using an operator. In fact, only Indian, Bangladeshi, and Maldivian passport holders are exempt from this requirement.
 
I'm not opposed to tours. Well, let me clarify: I'm not opposed to small tours (less than 18 people). With limited vacation time, tours are sometimes the most effective and efficient way to travel with minimal (literally no) planning. So I didn't experience the initial gut reaction of "ughhh" that some independent travelers may have about this requirement.
 
With this knowledge, I started my long, windy road to finding a pot of gold and (I hope) what will be a great operator for us.